Sometimes parents need to be reminded of some of the most
IMPORTANT PARENTING TRUTHS.
Some modern parents believe they are responsible for CREATING and PRODUCING a mature, successful teen. As in, they get the credit for their kid being awesome: “It’s all because of me—I did that!”
As their father, I have nothing to do with that crappy decision.
2. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN BEHAVIOR
We adults are responsible for a lot of stuff!
We have to…
-Pay way too much in taxes
-Keep our yard to the snobby standards of the HOA
-Do what our horrible boss says
-Obey the law
-Handle our emotions in a mature manner
-Teach and guide our children as best as we can
When our children act out, say something unacceptable, or make a poor decision, it may PUSH OUR BUTTONS.
This is the time to act like an adult.
As TEACHERS AND ROLE MODELS, it’s important that we show our kids a good example of self-control, and how to take responsibility for our own behavior.
This is important to remember because…
3. CHILDREN ACT LIKE CHILDREN
Allow me to remind you: Kids and teens are imperfect.
They are young and dumb. (Like that popular song on the radio, “Young, Dumb and Broke.”
Children/Teens will make mistakes. So when they do…don’t be surprised!
We acted like kids too!
So, when children act like children, act like an adult. Then when both you and your kid are calm, remember that…
4. PARENTS ARE TEACHERS
Parents teach important things like:
-Don’’t Cuss Your Boss Out
-Death and Taxes are Inevitable
This phrase was coined and made famous by author Julie Lythcott-Haims who wrote the book How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success. It essentially means that kids cannot be forced or shaped like bonsai trees. As much as us parents would sometimes like to force our kids into a certain shape, we cannot. Kids are like wildflowers, they grow where they want, and how they want. And when your kids is not growing in the manner you desire, it’s important to remember that…
6. YOU CAN STILL BE A GOOD PARENT AND HAVE A TROUBLED TEEN
Take a deep breath and ALLOW THAT TRUTH TO SINK IN.
If your daughter chooses to live an irresponsible life, and cuss her boss out, do drugs, and then one day, God forbid, ignore her HOA, that is her choice.
You taught her as best you could—and you did your best.
It will be hard on you to observe poor choices. Or worse, a train-wreck of a lifestyle. It would be hard on any parent.
And that is why…
7. SELF-CARE IN ESSENTIAL
Wow, this is sooooooo true.
Parents, we need to take care of ourselves.
Parents, before we take care of others, take care of ourselves, first.
Being a Grown Up Parent is Hard:
Lower back tattoos.
Kids who don’t listen and are slow learners.
Death and Freakin’ Taxes.
So parents, don’t forget to …
Click HERE here to read Sean’s article, “7 Things Every Guy Needs to Hear From His Parents.”
Or HERE to read “7 Things Every Teen Girl Needs to Hear From Her Parents.”
Be strong. Stay close. Teach wisdom.
Sean Donohue – Family Coach
How we help teens and parents:
Sean Donohue Family Coaching provides coaching and mentoring to hurting and defiant teenagers and we show parents how to restore love, order and communication to their family.
If your family is hurting or struggling with communication or defiance, we would love to partner with you and help you to restore love and communication in your home. We come to you. We don’t want or need “an office.” We connect with teens while doing activities they enjoy doing and meet with families in their homes.